The Beauty of Loneliness

Jun 21, 2013

I previously wrote about this restlessness/hunger/thirstiness that resides deep in our souls because of the what happened in Genesis 3...our banishment from intimacy with our life-source, God Himself.  And I've written that Jesus is the solution to this problem. That it is through Jesus Christ and His work on the cross that we have been granted access back to the Father. It was through Jesus that we are reconciled to God and have peace with Him.

For those who have trusted in Christ, our deepest soul longings are finally met...but that doesn't mean we realize and live in this truth all the time. Frankly, we live in this strange place called the "already but not yet." We already have this relationship with Christ, but we also live in the "not yet"...because this relationship is not yet fully realized. And because of this, we who have trusted in Christ still struggle with our longings. And we still turn to things other than Christ to attempt to fill those longings...things like personal relationships: spouses, children, family and friends, or things like careers, education, entertainment, reputations, etc. There are endless options of things that we can turn to!

I've begun to understand that every issue I struggle with is in someway rooted in this restless struggle with my longings, and that I am looking to something else besides my relationship with Christ for fulfillment and life. For example, When I am struggling with fear or anxiety, I am beginning to understand that I need to look beyond the emotion that I'm feeling to find the something in my life that I am looking to for life and fulfillment or security. When I find that something I begin to understand that the fear is rooted in the fact that I cannot hold on to that thing. That this particular thing is not secure, and my hope for fulfillment in that things is shaken and then fear results.

Recently this restlessness has shown itself in loneliness in my life. I frustratedly asked myself, how can I be lonely? My life is absolutely filled with people. I have a wonderful husband and we have a fantastic relationship...my kids are home from college and we are enjoying spending time together. I have an incredible family and church family, and I have great friends. It's a full and rich life.  And yet, underneath it all, there is still this ache of loneliness. Why?

Because all of these people and all of these relationships were never meant to fill the deepest longings of my heart. The loneliness that I feel is a beautiful signal to me to remind me that my heart is longing for something more. No, my heart is longing for Someone more. 

When I feel the tug of loneliness in my heart, I have some choices to make. I can get really, really busy to attempt to drown out this feeling. Or, I can become angry at the people in my life for the empty ache I feel. I can begin the blame game and try to make demands on those around me to fill that emptiness. But to be truthful, I've tried that route in the past, and it doesn't work. It doesn't work because it's never enough. The problem is not with them...the problem is with me.

But I do have another choice. I can allow that ache in my heart to point me to the One my heart is really looking for. I can use the emptiness that loneliness feels like to push me to think on Christ...to think on who He is...to meditate on all He has done. Thinking on Christ, meditating on Him, filling my heart and mind with thoughts of Him through God's Word, asking Him in prayer to stir my affections for Him...responding to Him in thankful worship for all that He is...this process changes me. It changes the emptiness of loneliness that tugs at my heart and changes it into what the Apostle Paul talks about:  a heart that is no longer empty but instead filled to the measure of all the fullness of God. Ahhhh...now this is what truly satisfies my soul!!!

Loneliness can be a beautiful thing if it points us to the true Source of fulfillment! 

My soul finds rest in God alone.My salvation comes from Him. He alone is my Rock and my Salvation.

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